FathersDay是关于本文可作为相关专业FathersDay论文写作研究的大学硕士与本科毕业论文FathersDay论文开题报告范文和职称论文参考文献资料。
Father’s Day
Yesterday was Father’s Day. I had planned to give my father a present, so I went to a store after lunch. I looked around the store and finally choose① a razor for him. After school, I ran back home and started my computer. I made a beautiful card and e-mailed him on the internet. Then I began to make supper with the help of my mother. When my father came home, he was very glad to look for② a big meal and a gift on the table. I asked him to check his e-mail. He was amazing③ to find a beautiful card in his e-mail-box. “What a wonderful surprise!” My father said.
江苏省连云港市赣榆区罗阳中学八(2)班 王婷
1. 优点:
本文是一篇描述父亲节的记叙文.小作者按照时间顺序,记录自己给父亲买礼物、设计贺卡和做晚饭的过程.文章最后用到了“amazed”描述了父亲当时的感受.整篇文章文字流畅、用词得当,是一篇不错的学生习作.
2. 需要修改的地方:
① choose改为chose.前后时态保持一致,此处应该使用一般过去时;
② look for改为find.look for强调“寻找”的动作,find强调“寻找”的结果;
③ amazing改为amazed.amazing用于描述物,意思是“令人惊讶的”;amazed用于描述人,意思是“感到惊讶的”.
3. 评分:
按江苏省连云港市中考英语作文满分25分的评分标准,本文修改前可得23分.
总结:该文是关于FathersDay论文范文,为你的论文写作提供相关论文资料参考。
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